I've mentioned Quora before - the website where people ask naive questions on trivial matters. It's a site just begging to be sent up and I sometimes wonder whether the contributors, in fact, first send in the questions and then write a clever answer. The following was spotted by Jamie. I hope the hapless US citizens reading it understand the irony and don't take it too seriously.
Is Australia a horrible place?
Donald Ferguson
Donald Ferguson, lived in Australia
Updated Oct 7
Definitely.
There is no internet in Australia. This message was written on paper and sent via carrier pigeon to a waiting Russian trawler where it was uploaded.
Australia is ruled by an evil king named Colin and his queen Cheryl. They live in a triple fronted brick veneer house in western Sydney. Colin has banned slavery and made free healthcare mandatory despite our vigorous protests. He even forces our kids to go to one of our thousands of free world class schools. Worst of all Colin makes us vote once every few years. Voting sometimes interrupts our saturday grocery shopping for 10 minutes or so. The only upside to this ordeal is a sausage sizzle at the polling booth.
The climate is terrible. There is nothing more boring than months and months of warm sunny days. We envy all those countries that have regular blizzards and deadly hurricanes.
Australia is incredibly backward. We are forced to use plastic cards to electronically transfer money instead of paper cheques. Our plastic banknotes make it impossible for counterfeiters to make a decent living.
Life is very hard. Our unfortunate minimum wage workers have to survive on as little as $20/hr and four weeks paid annual holidays. They only get another 10-15 paid public holidays each year. The cops won’t take bribes and expect you to obey the traffic rules. It is an absolute disgrace.
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